That’s A Red Flag!

Warning signs or “red flags” of an unhealthy relationship exist and teaching teens how to identify them early is an important skill. Scarsdale eighth grade students participated in an interactive presentation titled “That’s A Red Flag” facilitated by Ashley Bendiksen, a youth motivational speaker and healthy relationship advocate. The presentation was held on January 15th and was jointly sponsored by the Scarsdale Middle School Health Department, Scarsdale Edgemont Family Counseling Service and the Scarsdale SAFE Coalition.

Through personal stories and interactive discussion, Bendiksen educated students how to distinguish healthy relationships from harmful ones; recognize early warning signs of relationship violence and understand how respecting boundaries support mental health and personal growth. Students learned practical strategies for seeking help when needed and supporting friends who may be involved in an unhealthy friendship, all while learning to value the positive behaviors that foster strong, respectful relationships.

“Teaching older teens to have healthy romantic relationships begins with teaching them about healthy friendships” said Milagros “Millie” Chatelain, LMHC, Youth Outreach Worker on the Middle School level and the Safe Coalition Coordinator. “A fair number of students who seek services from Youth Outreach are dealing with anxiety and other mental health issues stemming from unhealthy friendships.”

Bendiksen highlighted several practical “red flags” for students that may indicate a friendship is unhealthy. Examples included feeling as though you are “walking on eggshells” around the other person: being asked to share locker combinations, passwords or their location; feeling as if you cannot say “no”, to the person; or feeling a sense of dread or exhaustion after spending time with them. Bendiksen concluded her program by emphasizing a key takeaway for students that a healthy relationship should make an individual feel both safe and supported. “Our students were attentive and engaged throughout the presentation, and they asked great questions,” said Chatelain.

Parents are encouraged to continue conversations about healthy friendships at home, and in their parent support groups, reinforcing a culture of safety, respect, and healthy relationships in school and in the community.

The Scarsdale SAFE Coalition is a violence prevention coalition dedicated to promoting safe, and healthy relationships and preventing all forms of school, community and interpersonal violence through education, advocacy, and collaboration. Scarsdale Edgemont Family Counseling Service serves as the coalition’s lead agency. Funding for Ms. Bendiksen’s presentation was provided by the Scarsdale Safe Coalition.

For more information about the SAFE Coalition, or to become involved, please contact Millie Chatelain, LMHC at mchatelain@sfcsinc.org.